Change is inevitable, constant—it's also frequently unexpected and relentless. But did you know we spend roughly half of our adult lives in the unsettling grip of major changes? Half... or more! Researcher and author Bruce Feiler calls massive life changes "lifequakes," and apparently we can expect to experience three to five of these in our lifetime. Oh, and get this, each one can take four to five years to move through. As if that's not enough, Feiler's research shows that we also face "workquakes" every 2.85 years, on average. That's a truly seismic chunk of work-life change!
The magnitude and intensity of change feels exponentially stronger too (IMO). Not sure what Feiler would say, but it seems to me that we're having more shared quakes these days. And, these collective experiences are transforming our individual work and life quakes into something even more earthshaking. Whatever the case, it's safe to say we're frequently in the $#!T, individually and collectively, and change fatigue is a real and stressful thing.
Whether an unforeseen quake is rocking your world now, or you're proactively looking to make a change, I would encourage you to focus some quality time and energy on well-being, mindset, and the opportunity to write (or rewrite) your story. A teacher of mine, Jeffrey Allen, posed the question, “Why do bad things happen to good people?" They don't, he went on to say. "Bad things happen to all people, so why not learn to deal with it in a healthy way?”
It's true. We've all had "Oh $#!T" moments in work and life. What do you do when you're smack in the epicenter and the aftershocks keep coming? For me, there are five strategies I come back to—lessons learned as I shifted from Oh $#!T to living a more balance life with meaning and purpose.
Don't Fight Life
When we accept what is, we can move from taking things personally and seeing ourselves as victims to creating what we want in our work and life. It's not easy. Our minds keep taking us back to what sucks about the situations we're facing or the unfairness of it all. Our minds want us to resist what is—and when we do that, we waste our energy fighting life. In my experience, that's not a fight we win. On the flip side, it’s far more practical, not to mention less stressful and exhausting, to accept what is.
When we stop resisting what is and accept reality, we suffer less. In doing so, we’re not accepting that our life circumstances will be this way forever. We’re not rolling over or becoming victims of circumstance—exactly the opposite! Acceptance is stepping into our power. In accepting what is, we’re accepting the present, so we can see situations clearly, make informed choices, and take positive action. We’re not letting past or future thoughts (and the resulting emotions) hijack our state of mind. We’re not creating more problems, because we can see that life events are simply that, events, not problems. If we let go of our resistance to what is, our choices become clear and we can take on any situation. If you're in the fight now, give yourself the gift of a mindful moment. Pause and close your eyes. Let it all go for a moment and just breathe.
You Write the Story
Joseph Campbell's "Hero's Journey" is used as the framework for literally every superhero story you've ever read or watched. It's also a powerful way to look at the journey of our life. We're all on a heroic journey. The journey is heroic because it’s hard. That's what makes the story so good. Nobody skates through the journey of life without soul rattling challenges—no matter how perfect (or how boring) the story of anyone's life looks from the outside in. The journey of fulfilling our purpose takes extraordinary courage. The journey tests us, fundamentally changing us as we come into our power and become the people we’re meant to be. Not gonna lie, the tests and trials royally suck at times, but each quake is a golden opportunity to write your story.
What do you want your story to be? With a mindset shift, you become the creator, the author of your life's story. Ditch the old narrative that paints you as the victim. Focus on what you learned, what you overcame, and how you grew. Tell the story of how your winding path and missed turns led you to an infinitely better destination. This mental shift gives rise to an energetic shift. (Hippie woo-woo alert here!) By changing your story, you create the energetic conditions for abundance, healing, and personal transformation. You discover the alchemists secret—the ability to transmute pain, fear, and confusion into joy, balance, and meaning. OK, so it's not the turning cheap metal to gold kind of alchemy, but it's arguably more valuable. Side note: if you do uncover the secret to the gold thing, please do share.
Your Purpose is Now
“Why am I here?" It's one of life's biggest questions. For many, myself included, the answer wasn't clear early on. I used to be envious of people who knew exactly why they were here and what they were meant to do. You know the ones; they move through life with an unshakable purpose that practically radiates around them. (So jelly.)I eventually found the clarity I was looking for, but not easily. It was a process. There's a shortcut in the process though: Be in your life. How do you know you're living your purpose? Be in your life. Your life is now, so whether you realized it before (or not), you are living your purpose right now. To engage with purpose and meaning, all we need to do is look at our life and be present there. Also true: purpose has layers.
Inner Purpose is the evolution of our awareness, our consciousness. It's the journey of being. Awakening to our essential self, who we are at our core—that's our inner purpose. Good news! It's always with us. It has always been there and we can't lose it. Outer Purpose is the evolution of our occupation. It's the journey of doing. This takes discovery for most of us, and it can change as we evolve our conscious awareness and presence. Outer purpose engages our unique blend of strengths and talents, as we apply them with clear intention in our life. Shared Purpose is the evolution of our spirit. It's a journey of love and unity. It's about aligning with a greater universal purpose that lifts all humanity. When we discover and embrace all three, life feels effortless. I'm sure that's super. But, most of us are figuring $#!T out. We're still living "on purpose" though, simply by being present in our lives.
Dream a New Dream
Here’s the thing, no one else can do your things, the things meant for you. Also, you’re not here for your personal journey alone. No pressure, but we’re all counting on you. We all need whatever it is you bring to this human experience adventure—our journeys are all connected! I believe the universe is perfect, so that means it can’t be wrong about you or the importance of what you, and only you, can contribute to our shared dream.
The shamanic teachers and practitioners that I’ve learned from have a beautiful perspective on our collective life experience: We dream the world into existence. Shamans span across many different cultures and are guardians of ancient wisdom, wisdom that is meant to be passed on. The view that we co-create with the universe is consistent across shamanic cultures. The premise is that we are all powerful creative forces and the world that we inhabit mirrors our collective intentions. Yeah, let that sink in. We’re writing the story as we go, co-creating with the universe. It's not just our personal story. It's the big story, the story of everything. What are you adding to the story? What do you want to dream into existence?
Trust Your Intuition
Wherever you are in your life journey, I invite you to connect with your intuition. See where it leads you now. Intuition can lead us toward not only our greatest good, individually, but the relationships and endeavors that are bigger than ourselves—like dreaming a better world into existence. We all have the gift of intuition, but it might be a little rusty. Luckily, anyone can learn how to recognize their intuition, cultivate it through practice, and actively tap into it. If you want to learn how check out the link in the More to Explore section.
When you're making the shift from Oh $#!T to life on purpose, it's important to trust yourself, trust your intuition, and know you can overcome the obstacles in your path. Maybe you started down one road and the tests and trials were too much, so you stopped or took a detour. What’s in the past is done, forget it. Let it go, pick up your journey again, and move on. We’ve all faced challenges. We've all lost. We've all failed. We've all triumphed. It’s all part of our bigger life quest. You can change your current life situation. You can face your fear and your shadows. You can answer the call to your life's adventure. If you already know what you need to work on or do, dive in. If not, keep moving forward with an open heart and mind. Trust that you have the capacity and strength for whatever it is that you’re meant to learn or do in this world. You got this!
More to Explore!
For more wellness content and publication updates for The Executive Hippie's Corporate Survival Guide, subscribe on the Executive Hippie Life site and follow us on social media channels @ExecHippieLife. For more on the topics in this article, check out the links below.
Letting go: https://bit.ly/Bag-of-Poo
Wellness strategy: https://bit.ly/hero-vacation
Being in your life/managing resistance: https://bit.ly/the-borg-the-bees
Connecting to your intuition: https://bit.ly/rekindle-intuition
Exploring purpose and intentions:
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